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Collaboration helps reduce divorce acrimony

New Jersey parents headed for a marital breakup can avoid ugly courtroom battles if both parties are properly motivated and make use of available resources. In the wake of divorce, it can be tempting to seek revenge through the litigation process, but doing so puts child welfare at risk. Making the best of a painful situation often requires finding workable solutions that put children in the best position to prosper.

Generally, the best place begin for a negotiated solution to child custody is assuming an equal split of parenting time between the parties. Most jurisdictions lean toward this configuration whenever possible and have set aside assumptions based upon historical perceptions of gender roles in parenting. Equal parenting is merely a starting point. Parents must be honest with each other and themselves in considering individual parenting styles, logistical factors and the best interests of the children. The key is for all parties to make use of available information and processes to find solutions benefitting the family.

Collaborative divorce is a process through which attorneys and mediators guide families and make use of counselors and other professionals to find the healthiest way forward for divorcing families. Collaboration is not for every situation, but it's worthy of consideration for most couples. Considering the needs of the children as well as tempering individual expectations of winning the divorce can lead to a successful post-divorce parenting relationship.

The divorce process is loaded with the potential for emotion-driven missteps that complicate and distract from the ultimate goal, which is ending the marriage efficiently and moving toward a better future. A qualified family law attorney could help ascertain whether collaborative divorce is an option for those considering a split.

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